Mornings Are Like That

I see some strange things in the mornings.

It's not like I'm leaving for work at an ungodly time of the morning. I would even say it's later than most people that leave for a job in the mornings. But nevertheless, I see some strange stuff on my way to work.

For example, there is an elderly lady over on Elyria Avenue. I have seen her outside in the morning with a bucket of what I'm assuming is soapy water and a rag and she's cleaning her garbage can. Now, Elyria Avenue isn't in Lorain, it's actually in Sheffield Township. That means that they have the one man garbage trucks and the big plastic bins for garbage. No waste employee has to get out of the truck to empty the bins, they are all done automatically. I wish Lorain would go to that, but I digress.

So, I have seen this nice lady washing down her garbage can on garbage day. Personally, I think that's kinda awesome! No sanitation worker will appreciate the disinfectant fresh smell, but I like her way of thinking. Unfortunately, I don't have enough hours in a day (or energy for that matter) to scrub my house with soap and water like I'd like to, I'm sure not going to scrub my garbage cans. This has been on my to-do list all summer though! I wanted all garbage cans in the house and out to be taken outside and scrubbed. Not a one has been cleaned yet, but hey, it at least made my to-do list. That's gotta count for something.

This morning was a good one. I was over on East River Road and I saw a guy standing next to the road. I slowed down as I wasn't sure if he wanted to cross the road or was waiting for me to go by. As I passed him, I noticed some road kill on the road right in front of him. My best guess is a raccoon, but whatever.

No lie: As soon as I drove by, this guy bends down, picks UP the road kill by a paw and chucks it across the road! For real! First of all, not for love or money would I have picked up this dead animal with my hands. Second, to chuck it across the road? Talk about keeping your property clean! I'll have to look there the next time I go by to see if he had a neighbor across the street or if it's just woods. Either way, that guy needs a new hobby. Eww!

As long as I'm talking about my morning commute, I have one complaint. Well, I have a LOT of complaints about driving, but I'll narrow this bitch session down to one!

Before anyone starts in on me, during my first two years of grade school, one of my Dad's jobs was driving the school bus. When I started school, he changed the route a little so that the school bus would pick me up right outside of the house and I didn't have to walk two blocks to get picked up like the older siblings did. Yes, my Daddy loved me!

Well, he only did that for two years, but after he left, the next bus driver kept the route the same so I got picked up right outside. However, if I wasn't outside waiting, the bus would leave without me. I know that for a fact because I remember missing quite a few buses because suddenly I'd see a stray dog out there and I'd go screaming into the house. By the time Mom would calm me down and walk me back outside, the bus would be gone. My terror of canines started young.

Anyway, again on Elyria Avenue, now that school is back in session, I find I'm getting stuck behind some school buses. I'm ok with that in theory, but when one bus stops to pick up three kids within a two block span, that is ridiculous! And, NONE of the kids seem to be ready before the bus actually stops in front of their house. I guess when you see the bus pull in front of your house, that means it's finally time to go brush your teeth, put your shoes on, kiss Mom good bye, pet the dog, go pee one more time, kiss Mom again and yeah, maybe then little snowflake can walk out of the door. Snowflake # 1 safely in the school bus, the bus slowly moves up four houses and we start the whole thing again.

The bus is outside. It's now time to eat breakfast, braid your hair, kick the dog, have a fight with Mom, brush your teeth, do your homework, and then get your little butt outside.

Have I mentioned that there are THREE of them in a two block strip? It can take upwards of five minutes to get through these three houses. I'm not exaggerating. Why in the world can't these little snowflakes meet somewhere in between the three houses and make it one stop? Of course, we'd actually have to be ready on time in the morning. Wow. What a concept. I need to look for new ways to go to work or else I have to go back to leaving a lot earlier in the morning. It's not a good way to start your day getting angry at kids trying to go to school! Ugh.

So, that's how my mornings have been lately. My next job really has to be one that I can telecommute. Or I need to win the lottery. I'm jiggy either way.