Thursday, September 01, 2011

That's Just Wrong, Page 25

Oh my goodness, if only I could write fiction this good. Some times the idiots in this world are put in jobs where they have to interact with the public. I can't make this stuff up!

I pay way too much for cable TV every month. I know it, but it's one of my few luxuries left. We have three DVR boxes in the house and if you've never had one or TiVo or something like that, you don't know what you are missing. It's one thing to be able to tape so much bad TV but one of my favorite parts is that I can get up and pee or go to the kitchen or answer the phone and put the TV on pause. Yes, even live TV! That was one of the best things ever invented!

Now a new addition to Time Warner Cable has been the remote DVR Manager. This is where I can log in at work (shh! Don't tell Mike!), and tape Big Brother so I don't get involved with something at home and forget to run upstairs and tape it. It's the coolest thing!

I know I could do this at home on the actual cable box the night before but whatever. The ability to do this remotely is awesome.

Until the time comes that you have to deal with Time Warner and all of the warm fuzzies you've been feeling about the remote DVR manager just disappear.

I went to log on yesterday to tape Big Brother (yes, I have a reality TV addiction. I've covered that here before. Let's move on.) and I couldn't log in. I got a page of gibberish whenever I tried yesterday to log in. It said to try back later, so I didn't think much about it. But, we did go the extra mile and try to log in on Ron's computer and his APad with the same results. Nothing.

Well, today I tried again since Big Brother is on yet again! Still gibberish. I was going to look for a number to call them to see if it's me or if it's their system. That's when I saw that they have live customer service chat available. I am usually a huge fan of live customer service chat! That way, I can get my issue solved in real time and ask any and all the questions I have as they come to me.

I logged in. I'm gonna tell you right now that I've changed the names of the two geniuses I chatted with today. I figured that was the least I could do for their families.

Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:35:28 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Thank you for contacting Time Warner Cable. At the end of our chat you will be given the option of taking a brief survey. My name is Clueless # 1. Please give me a moment while I access your account.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:35:38 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

hello!


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:38:00 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I understand you are unable to to access DVR manager, am I correct?


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:38:01 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

correct


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:39:11 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I will surely assist you to access DVR online manager.


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:39:53 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

May I know your billing address of the account.

I'll edit this part out of copying and pasting this conversation for my own safety!

Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:13 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Thank you for the information.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:09 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

that is also the service address


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:14 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i have two accounts


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:30 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Yes.


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:37 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I will refresh the signal to your cable box to resolve this issue. This normally take a few minutes, I am with you. Please confirm when the box is up and if the issue has resolved. Please switch on the box when you see the clock on the box


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:40:54 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i am not at home


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:41:04 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i am trying to access the remote dvr manager


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:41:30 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Okay.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:42:02 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

it's the remote dvr manager that will not work. i get a page of gibberish.

There was silence for a good couple of minutes. Finally, I asked if he was still there!

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:45:40 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

are you there?


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:45:54 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Yes.


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:46:33 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I have checked the DVR now.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:46:34 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

which one?


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:46:46 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

It is switched off now.

Now I really had a sinking feeling that he was not listening to me, or else he was just going off of a script that they have where the first instruction, regardless of what is wrong, is to reboot the DVR box.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:48:37 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

did you understand my problem? the REMOTE dvr manager is not working. i cannot access this through the computer.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:49:03 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

you switched off a DVR, but i have THREE of them at this location. which one did you shut off and how is that helping?


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:49:52 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I have not switched off the DVR manager.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:50:07 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:46:46 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

It is switched off now.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:50:12 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

what is switched off?


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:50:43 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

The DVR cable box is in offline mode so you are unable to access it.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:51:03 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

are all of them offline???


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:52:13 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

hello??


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:52:38 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Let me check all the DVr cable box now.

Remember, I have three DVR boxes, so which one is he talking about? I was getting so frustrated! Maybe it's me and I couldn't convey my thoughts to this guy. I decided to escalate this to a supervisor.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:53:05 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

is there a supervisor that i may speak with?


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:53:38 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Yes.


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:54:35 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I will transfer the chat to the Supervisor now.


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:54:44 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Please wait till I transfer your chat now.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:54:47 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

thank you


Clueless # 1(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:55:34 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>Please wait, while the problem is escalated to another analyst

Analyst has entered room

Analyst Supervisor, Clueless # 2 has entered room

Analyst has left room


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:55:50 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Hello!

Analyst Clueless # 1 has left room


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:55:52 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

hello! are you a supervisor?


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:55:57 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

This is Clueless # 2, the supervisor on floor.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:55:56 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

thank you

I was actually at this moment confident that something was going to happen now! Alas, I was wrong.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:56:17 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i am trying to access the dvr manager remotely through a computer. for the last two days this is not working.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:56:30 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i get a page of gibberish when i try to log into the remote dvr manager.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:56:38 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i've tried now from three different computers


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:58:47 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I sincerely apologize for all the inconvenience caused to you.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 14:59:20 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

can you fix it


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:00:10 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I regret to inform you that we are experiencing an technical issue with the website.

REALLY???? Ok, now I've kinda lost my cool here.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:00:43 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

if Mr. Clueless # 1 would have said that instead of rebooting one of the cable boxes, this issue would not have escalated to you.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:00:50 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

thank you


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:01:38 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

any time frame on when this will be corrected?


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:02:34 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Sorry about it.


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:02:48 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I'd suggest you to check with your friends or neighbors if they are able to get it.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:03:12 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

serious?

Mr. Supervisor, Clueless # 2, or whoever was playing him, just sat there for the longest time. I think he was hoping I'd just go away.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:03:35 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

and how will that information help me?

Still nothing.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:04:45 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

if my three computers can't get in, you can't tell if it's my account or your system that's the problem?

He just sat here, I still think hoping I was going to just go away. Suddenly, it hit me! This is going in the blog!! I thought I better warn him and sure enough, he answered me right away!

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:05:16 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

this conversation can end up in my blog, so please think about your answers!


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:05:54 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

You are right. I'd have felt the same if I were you.


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:06:22 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

However, we are still receiving similar complaints from your area.

Now I just felt that this was some schmuck sitting there, with a whole list of answers to cut and paste into the chat window, regardless of what was being asked of them.

Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:06:40 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

are you a real person?

Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:07:28 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Yes.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:08:48 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

then your answer remains that i should check with my neighbors and friends to see if they have the same problem that supposedly is being reported in my area.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:08:51 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

do i have that right?

Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:09:47 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

Yes, also I'd like to inform you that we are aware of this issue and our team is working on it.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:09:52 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

i will note that.


Ree(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:09:59 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

thank you

Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:10:14 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

You are welcome.


Supervisor, Clueless # 2(Thu Sep 01 2011 15:10:26 GMT-0400 (Eastern Daylight Time))>

I appreciate your cooperation and understanding in this matter.

I couldn't beat that dead horse any more.

With unemployment running rampant, is THIS what Time Warner hires? THESE guys are good representatives for your company? For real?

I wish I had the guts to just shut it all off. Get rid of the cable, the TVs, wow. Just think about how much I could get done in a day.

As for Time Warner live chat support however, that's just wrong!

2 comments:

Lisa said...

PULL THE PLUG ON TIME WARNER!
You can do it!
Big Brother is on regular FREE teevee anyway - why pay for it?

Today's word verification could be the name of one of those reps - Bablo.
Used in a sentence:
Bablo said eep opp ork ah ah, when it's fixed it will work. Just ask your neighbors.

Loraine Ritchey said...

AHHHHHHHHH another Time Wornout fiasco welcome to the club Loraine