Sunday, May 23, 2010

Not The Way To Start A Day

I've had a few rough days this past week.

I came down with a case of creeping cruds last week and come Monday, I thought I was just starting anew. Boy was I wrong!

I started my Monday with my yearly (a few years late this time) girlie doctor appointment.

Ok, let's talk here. I've recently changed doctors and while I really like him, this was his first time meeting my girlie parts. I don't care who you are, the first appointment is a tough one. Gentle or not gentle. Is he going to comment that I didn't shave my legs? (Don't judge me! I shaved my pits for crying out loud. That should be enough for anyone!)

As a side note here and as a public service announcement for anyone that might not agree with my opinion. And keep in mind, this is only my opinion.

If you need a doctor to look at your girlie parts, pick a man doctor. Women doctors suck at examining women. Wait. I have a theory over here as to why they suck! They've had internal exams. They probably have had children. So, they know exactly what you're going through and they are NOT gentle about it. I believe that in their minds, they are hearing an internal dialog that sounds something like "suck it up, bitch. Worse than this has gone in and or out of here". Yeah. It's ugly.

I say you need a man down there. He has no clue what a speculum feels like being shoved up your wahoo. The only thing he can liken this appointment to is his yearly prostate exam. Yeah. He's MUCH more gentle with your nether regions. I've had three women doctors in my day and at least that many men. I'll take a man thinking about his prostate exam over a woman who's birthed a 13 pound watermelon any day. Now I'm off of my soap box.

That's how Monday started. On the good news side here, I got the results back from my Pap. Negative! That's the exact word you want to hear when it comes to a Pap. Negative. All is good in my world, or at least with my cervix.

As a reward for making it through Monday, Ron and I went for dinner with our friends, Larry and Linda. We went, had a nice dinner and then Larry dropped us off at our door. He even pulled up under the overhang so that I could get out and not get wet in the rain! How awesome is that?! Unfortunately, I was too excited about getting out of the car and not getting wet that I let a few things slide.

For instance, the first thing Tuesday morning, I'm in the kitchen putting coffee on when my phone rang. It's not usually a good way to start the morning with a ringing phone at 7:00 am. Something is wrong.

I grabbed my phone and saw it was my friend Linda. I couldn't imagine the bad thing she was going to tell me. What she told me was that as she was getting ready to leave for work, looked in the back of her car and what did she see? MY PURSE! Aargh, I'm still not used to having to carry a freakin' purse.

So, what to do. She doesn't have time to run it over so we agreed that she would leave it on her back porch and I would head right over to retrieve the purse. Let me tell you, I've never gotten ready so fast! I drove to her house as carefully, but quickly, as I could. Sure enough, there was my purse. Wow. I about had a heart attack thinking of what could have happened in the few minutes that my purse was unattended! I trust no one. So, my purse is back in my possession, where it belongs.

As I was working Tuesday, I started to think about what a tough couple of days. I know most people probably have had much bigger problems in their days, but for me, this was a tough couple of days! How to make up for this? BINGO!

I called Ron and asked if he'd be interested in a rousing game of Bingo at one of the local churches. Ron was all about it! We talked Phil into it and the three of us headed to Bingo as soon as I got home.

This was the BEST decision I've made in a long time! I was the BIG winner of the night, walking out with my $525 in winnings! What a freakin' windfall!!! My first thought was to put it to good use, like on bills. Then, I came back to my senses and decided that found money should be blown!

Wednesday, I headed to one of my favorite stores, Bed, Bath & Beyond and I went crazy! The next post will be the booty! I have pictures and everything!

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