Something To Blog About

Even with all the travel, I've been having a hard time lately thinking of anything blog worthy to share. Other than complaining about the cold, nothing much is fit to print.

Until today.

Ron and I started having a nice, calm Saturday. I like to lay low, not do too much, and just enjoy down time. Then we went out to face the world and run some errands.

I bought a new blouse! And two pairs of shoes!! These facts alone should be blog worthy, but alas, that's not what I'm writing about.

Some of you have heard the stories about our house. We have had, from time to time, strange things happen. Nothing bad, just . . . strange. Like doorbells ring when we don't have a doorbell hooked up. Or, footsteps on the floor above you when no one else is in the house. And, ok, a few things have been moved here and there. See? Nothing big, just strange.

We came home from running errands tonight somewhere around 8:00 p.m. Ron unpacked the few groceries we bought, while I went down to the basement to work with laundry. When we finally got up to the second floor, Ron headed up in the attic for a smoke. I went to go into the bathroom and there it was. The rugs were askew.

I know that doesn't sound like much, but picture this: We have a step up from the floor to ease in getting in and out of the tub. On this step, I have a rubber backed bath mat. On the floor below the step, I have a soft plush rug. Both of these rugs were seriously askew.

I don't believe that they got that way for no reason. I yelled upstairs asking Ron if he had been in the bathroom since he's been upstairs. No, he headed straight for the attic. The rugs, especially the rubber backed one, don't move that easily. I am not always straightening them. Aside from when cleaning, they pretty much stay put. Then I started to think.

They almost looked like someone peeled out on them. Sort of like turning quickly for a hasty exit. Then, my mind started to run all kinds of scenarios, especially with the excitement in the neighborhood a few weeks ago. Now I am starting to panic a little bit.

I as calmly as I could, wait for Ron to come back downstairs. I think told him that I want to check the house, because the rugs look like someone went running out of the bathroom in a hurry.

He started in the attic. Then, we checked the second floor, including in the closets and under beds. The first floor, I looked in big cupboards where someone could fit. The basement, I made Ron check the coal cellar and the dry cellar as well as behind the furnace. All windows and doors were verified shut and locked.

So, with a human intruder eliminated from suspicion . . . what happened to our rugs?

One more on the list of strange things in the house.

Miscellaneous Meanderings

I've got a lot of little stuff to write about. It's been a heck of a weekend!

First to back track a little bit, for my birthday, Ron got me a pizzelle iron! Ok, I've made them before with my sister, Barb. I remember them being a lot of work, but the end result is just so worth it. I was excited to get going with my very own pizzelle iron!

Where to start? I called Mary Jane, who makes the best pizzelles around. I asked for her recipe, and since she loves me, I also got a free lesson in how to make them. Bonus! Mary Jane, Mike, Ron and I met up for dinner Saturday night and then back to our house to start cooking.

One thing I didn't remember is how l o n g it takes to make a batch of pizzelles. Our guests made sure I had a good handle on things, and decided it was time to cut out for home. Me and my iron sat there and had some mindless time together. Put the batter in, light goes from green to red, when it goes back to green again, pizzelles are done, take them out of iron, place on cooling rack. Rinse and repeat. And repeat. And repeat. I gave up I think about 11:00 or so. Ron was a sport and took over until well after midnight. He really did the lion's share. I was able to finish up the batch on Sunday in just over an hour.

Now I have pizzelles. And they are absolutely awesome! My iron isn't exactly like Mary Janes, so my pizzelles come out a little smaller and a little thicker, but they are still good. No, they are still awesome. If anyone wants some, you better get back to my house before I get there on Friday! I'm drooling over here just thinking of them!

Now today is Monday, and that means I flew back to Chicago. From Cleveland to Chicago, I am on a small regional jet. It seats only 50 passengers and all bags larger than a briefcase or a lap top bag must be checked as there is no room in the overhead compartments. So, when I have to come to Chicago in the winter time, I pack my large suitcase, and pack my coat in my bag to save room in the overheads, then check the bag. When I get to baggage claim, I take my coat out and I'm good to go. Usually I'm only coatless for about a minute at curb side check in.

This morning when we left the house, it was -2 degrees. Yes, that's MINUS two degrees. I thought I'd just forego curbside check in and go on inside the airport to check in. At the last minute, I had a brain fart. The guy at curb side might have recognized, me, or else he was just humping another bag. But he grabbed my bag and said "ready?" I wasn't going to argue. I said sure, but I want to put my coat in my bag before you take it. Of course, this was the day he was going to have printer probems and it took awhile to get my baggage check ticket printed out; with me standing there is -2 degree weather with no freakin' coat on. Can you say brrr?

A nice brisk walk through the airport the 50 miles to my gate helped a little bit. By the time I got to the "D" terminal, I could almost feel my toes again. However, it didn't get any better after that. The terminal was absolutely freezing. The jetways are not well insulated, and the cold air was just coming right through the doors. Then when the doors were open to load or unload passengers it was even worse. Man not a good day to pack my coat in my bag.

Wait, it gets worse. It's finally my turn to board the plane. I can't feel my fingers or toes walking down the jetway. This was not a good day to be an elite flyer with Continental. My seat number was 3A. That means I'm really up in the front of the plane. Really really close to the open freakin' door. No wait. Not just one door, the galley service door is open as well! Two doors open and I'm right in front of them. Holy crap, I've never been this cold. The chintzy blanket in the overhead that I grabbed really didn't do much to help either.

I finally get into Chicago, get to baggage claim and pull out my warm cozy coat. I was never so happy to see some blue fabric as I was when I opened my bag!

Now, I've heard two different temperatures on the radio leaving the airport. One said we had a wind chill of -35 and a second opinion said a wind chill of -25. I don't care which one you go with, it's freakin' COLD. And at this point, I don't think that 10 degrees really matters in the scheme of things.

So now I must give Enterprise Rental Cars their moment. I was checking out a car for the week, when they said I get a PT Cruiser. Hey, I'm ok with that. I waited in the semi warm building for the guy to go get my car and bring it to the door for me. (I love this part of this Enterprise!) What do I see when he comes around? They have washed the car! It is now encapsulated in ice!! The entire car!!! Hello? Who in their right mind would wash a car in sub zero weather? This guy actually said to me that they just couldn't give me a dirty car. No, they'd rather give me a frozen shut car. I warned him that he better show up with a blow torch if I end up where I can't get in or out of this car. I had to pound some ice off of the side view mirrors to see out of them before I left!

So, it's been a miserable Monday weather wise. I haven't been warm since I crawled out of bed this morning. Now I'm sitting here in the hotel, the heat is turned up to about 80 and I'm looking at my king sized bed with the ultra plush comforter. So if y'all will excuse me, I think I need to crawl up under them covers and try to defrost my toes.

News Flash!

It's finally here! I saw announced this morning that the newest (and sadly the last) Harry Potter book is due for release on July 21, 2007. I am so excited about this fact!

Even worse, on that day, the book will be delivered to my house. Here's hoping I'm home that day to get the mail.

Any guesses on who bites the dust? I was thinking Ron and Hermione would be killed off saving Harry while finally killing Voldemort. Then again, maybe Longbottom is meant to go. But who knows? Perhaps it would really be a twist if it's Professor Snape and Malfoy that will be done in!

Oh mercy. It's going to be a long six months until I can find out the last of the secrets.

Oopsie

I am working this audit with an auditor from another branch. When traveling together, we do our best to split all of the expenses. We buy our own airline tickets, hotel bills and meals. Some shared expenses, like our rental car, we take turns paying the bill so both branches absorb about the same in expenses.

This week, my partner rented the car. By the way, regardless of who rents the car, I seem to be the one driving! ME! The one who gets lost often! But, since I'm the one that's been here before, she thought I would know my way around at least a little bit.

Anyway, whoever rents the car also assumes the rest of the expenses that go along with the car like the parking at the hotel, the parking meters and the gas for the car. I know we're only a week and a half into the audit but so far, we were doing well.

Tonight, we worked late, then headed straight to dinner. Parking is really at a premium here, and I never seem to be able to park any closer than a block away from where ever I want to be. If you read yesterday's post, it's beyond cold over here, so even a block walk can hurt. We had a great Italian dinner - my veal marsala was the BOMB - and when walking back to the car, my partner suddenly said "do you remember me putting money into the parking meter?" You know words like that can't end well.

We rushed over to the car like that was going to help our cause. She was trying to see what the meter said in the dark. Having been here before, I happen to know that when there is time on the parking meter, there is a red light that flashes. No flashing, no time on the meter. That helps the parking nazis know who they can give a ticket before they even waste time getting out of their cars.

I had the answer before she did - I pulled the ticket off of the windshield. $10.00 extra for that veal marsala!

My only question now is . . . if I add a column to my expense account titled "brain fart", can I expense that parking ticket?

Who'd Believe It?

Who in their right mind would believe that Cleveland's weather is worse than Chicago's? But it's true. I've seen it with my own two baby blues.

I left Cleveland Monday morning with four inches of snow in my driveway. When I got to Chicago, it was snowing, but lightly and there was really no accumulation on the ground. But it was colder than anything. Man, it is absolutely bitter cold here this week.

Monday, we were supposed to land at 9:45 am. We actually landed at 9:30 but because of some kind of troubles with other flights, we were put in a plane parking spot next to a fence. The captain told us we should only be 10 or 15 minutes before our gate opened up and we could taxi over. So, I did what everyone should do when they are on the company clock. I fell asleep and took a little nap! I woke up at 10:30 and we're still in our parking spot by the fence! So much for 10 or 15 minutes. It was finally almost 11:00 am before we found our gate. What a long flight that turned out to be.

This morning, I took a bottle of water with me from the hotel to the car so I would have it to drink at the job site. Well, I got out of the car, grabbed my laptop bag and didn't think about the water until I was in the building. By then I was frozen half to death and didn't want to walk back to the car. When we finally got back to the car after work, my water was frozen solid! That's how cold it is outside!

As miserable as I was with the cold, I did feel a little better when I got to the hotel. I grabbed my cup of hot herbal tea in the lobby and went to get into the elevator to go to the 6th floor. I ended up sharing the elevator with a young man who was looking a little blue around the gills. We said our hellos and he said something about how cold it was. I said, yeah, it's a bit brisk out there. Come to find out that he just flew in from Arizona where he'd never seen snow before! Talk about a culture shock! I think he had trouble wrapping his mind around the fact that I came from Cleveland where the weather was even worse than what he just experienced.

Yeah, I've been feeling a little better about the cold after that one. Poor guy.

It's Finally MY Turn!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's finally MY turn.

I had a phone call from my boss this morning informing me that my promotion has become official! It only took me 3-1/2 years to get it, but by golly it's finally mine.

Say good bye to Staff Auditor, and say hello to Associate Auditor. Ok, the title sucks and to me makes no sense, but who cares about the title. I say, "show me the money"!

The promotion does come with a color coordinated raise. And, to complete the look, the accessories that go with my new look, are that my bonuses are now calculated at a higher rate, thus, they should be bigger bonuses.

What changes in my actual job duties? Not a damn thing. That's the killer. I've been doing all of the work all along, just not getting compensated for it.

So there you go. New business cards; yeah that's about all that will change. Ok, that and the paycheck! Hallelujah, it's finally a raise!

I am excited, but I'm not sure it's all sunk in yet. Now I have the feeling of now what? I've been complaining about this damn promotion for the last year and a half. So now what? Holy cow, can I actually sit back and try to enjoy it? Wow. New concept.

For now, y'all can congratulate the new Associate Auditor. It's been a long time in coming, but . . . it's finally MY turn! Oh, but don't call me. I was so excited tonight that when I left the audit site, I left both of my cell phones sitting on the desk. I guess some things will never change. I will continue to take after my Dad in so many ways, including his forgetfulness.

How Many Wrongs Make A Right?

Today I had a little case of one of them days.

I am back on my Chicago tour of duty. I started this audit this morning, so I'll be commuting every week for about five or six weeks. Sounds easy, right?

As before, Ron is nice enough to get up at oh-my-gosh-o'clock to get me to the airport. We left the house the first time when I realized that I left my boarding pass on the dining room table. Ron turned around and I ran back in the house to pick it up. Too bad I didn't pick up the file next to it that I also needed.

Cleveland weather wasn't the best this morning. We had rain and about 30 degree temperatures, so it was a little treacherous on the roads. From what I hear, planes don't like this either. That means that we had to go through the de-icing process before we could take off. That wouldn't be bad, except that every plane leaving had to be de-iced. So, there was a long line that delayed us in leaving for over an hour. This sounds like a bad thing, but in reality, it turned out to be a good thing! They had pushed us back from out gate into a holding area while we waited for our turn on the de-icing pad. I made use of this time to take a nice long nap on company time! This turned out to be a Philip kind of nap! I fell asleep in the holding area, slept through the de-icing, slept through take off and slept through most of the flight. I woke up when we started our descent. Yeah, I could dig that on every flight! Nothing to worry about when you sleep through it all. And, on company time. Bonus!

Only problem with this theory is that I was still half asleep when I got off of the plane. That's bad because I left my book on the plane. Grr. And, I only had about 100 pages left! Geez! Now it's to the point that it's really a page turner, and it's still in my seat back pocket along with my toll receipt from this morning and my business card (cheap book mark) and my ticket stub. Grr.

So, a few obstacles aside, it wasn't a bad day. I was able to get my boarding pass, the file I left at home isn't imperative to this week; I can bring it back with me next week. And, as for my book, I walked over to Border's after dinner and got me another copy. I tried for a sob story hoping to get a discount on the book. I mean after all, I'm not going to read the whole thing, just 100 pages or so! I thought it was a good argument, but it didn't fly. I paid full price.

Happy Day To Me!

But what a way to celebrate!

First of all, yesterday was my birthday. As anybody that knows me well knows, I LOVE my birthday! Can't help it. I celebrate for all I'm worth, usually for the entire month of January. However, since I've been so sick this month, I'm behind on my celebrating.

We did start off a great weekend with lunch with Mike and Mary Jane at Hoggy's Barbeque. We were stuffed little piggies by the time we were done there. The best thing was, the manager noticed it was a celebratory lunch and even sent over a cake for four to our table to cap off a wonderful lunch. Any time there is chocolate cake involved, that's just a bonus.

Yesterday, Ron said we could go anywhere I wanted for my birthday. Well, what I wanted was a quiet dinner at home, with just the two of us. Hey, it's my birthday, I'm entitled to enjoy it any way I want to! So that is what we did.

Ron cooked my absolute favorite meal for me that was ready when I got home from work (fried cabbage and macaroni, thank you very much!) and we had a nice dinner then curled up on the couch together to watch the premier of American Idol. Hey, I still have that reality TV sickness in me. I'm telling you it was a great night!

However, there was excitement during the day around our house. Here is an article that was in our local paper.

The SWAT team is what Ron faced when he tried to go out on a service call yesterday morning. You see, all this happened two doors down from us. I told you our neighborhood was exciting. He walked out of the house yesterday morning, holding a cup of coffee and went to his van parked next to the garage. Police with guns was all he could see. Luckily he was allowed to leave without incident.

So there is my exciting birthday. I sure could have done without a strong armed robbery in my neighborhood complete with the SWAT team.

To make up for this, the birthday card I received from my brother Philip specifically told me to go out and to have a margarita for my birthday, with additional instructions that it doesn't have to be just one. I think for once I will listen to my big brother and Friday night we are going to our favorite Mexican restaurant to do just that! Phil, the first one will be for you!

Please Forward My Mail

I've been staying in Columbus for quite a few weeks now. Most of those weeks have been spent at the same hotel. The staff is great, but the hotel is undergoing renovations. That means we get a great rate, but have to put up with construction. The banging stops by 7:00 pm and they don't start until close to 8:00 am so I don't hear much of it. And, trust me, the place definitely needs updated.

My wireless card on my laptop is breathing its last breath, so when I checked in this week, I asked for a hard wired room. That's just a room with a USB port. After searching available rooms upon check in, a manager finally came out. We were all joking and kidding. Then he heard my name and recalled I've had a few difficulties with the hotel lately. Like my last stay was double billed. But hey, a phone call to the manager fixed the problem immediately. The few issues I've had have all been handled in a like manner, with the staff seemingly happy to help and correct what needed done. (And, yes, I did send an e-mail to the corporate office regarding the great staff here! Problems aside, they have all been wonderful.)

I don't know if it's just because the manager recognized my name or just because I was a paying guest, but he said "give her a room on the sixth floor". Hey, I don't care what floor I'm on as long as it's clean. The manager said I'd like this room as the sixth floor has already been remodeled and he thought I'd appreciate the new amenities.

I really don't need much, but who am I to argue about being trying out new amenities? I took my stuff up to the room and almost knew right then that I liked it! Ok, it might have something to do with the 42" plasma TV. I know it's not the Art Deco decor. I could take or leave that part. Aside from the awesome TV, this has the most comfortable bed I've ever slept in. I mean it is fantastic!

With a room like this, who in the heck wants to go to work in the morning? Well, come Tuesday morning, I had to do it whether I liked it or not. However, about 10:00 in the morning, the building was quickly filling with a most noxious smell that got worse by the minute. A sewer line burst. I was almost feeling like Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs there for a minute. It was a smell like I will never forget. While waiting for a crew to fix the problem, they were spraying some kind of stuff in the air to counteract the smell. That was making a bad situation worse, as that caused people to start losing their breakfasts. The department I am in was evacuated to the other side of the building. It was better over there, but not great. Since I was sick anyway, and I couldn’t do anything from the other side of the building, I decided to pack up and head back to the hotel. I definitely had enough work there to keep me busy for the day.

Yeah, I lead a tough life. Me and my 42” plasma TV and my most comfy bed. I did work for awhile, then loaded up on my cough medicine and took a long nap. It was a hard day for sure. Lucky for me, Wednesday all was not fixed yet. So, another day spent working from the hotel. I did take another nap that afternoon, but I also really did work! I got quite a bit accomplished, although I never seem to be close to being done.

Now it’s business as usual. I had to come back to earth and join the real people, having to get up in the morning and work the old 8-5 grind. Oh well. It was great while it lasted.

It’s A New Day

And I still feel like crap.

Ok, maybe a little smaller pile of crap, but still crap.

I made it to work last week for a few hours on Thursday and even fewer hours on Friday. Yeah, my first week of work of the year and I’ve used three sick days! That just sucks.

But now it’s Monday and I made it to Columbus in one piece. I tried to work hard today but my concentration seemed to come and go. So, I just did what I could do and called it good.

I do feel badly though, about the way the house was left for Ron. All of our comforters/blankets in the living room are strewn to and fro. Hey, it was grab a piece of real estate in the living room and cover up with whatever is in reach. That room was definitely lived in during our illness. Aside from that, the cupboards are bare. It just got to the point that neither of us wanted to dress enough to meet a delivery person at the door, so we started cooking. It’s unbelievable to me that we are down to practically bare cupboards! Ok, they are not empty, but many staples that we always have on hand are not on hand. Like onions – who can cook without onions? Or, like pierogis, or hamburger or fish sticks or turkey mignon or even chicken. Last night I finished up the peanut butter! Can you believe my house without peanut butter? This truly is unheard of. I see a very expensive shopping trip coming up this weekend for sure.

Going back to my work life, I just got word today that I’ll be heading back to Chicago on the 22nd of January. It’s good and it’s bad, this trip to Chicago. It’s good because I will make money there plus the people are great plus the food is awesome! The bad part is once again going to Chicago in January. Good thing I love de-icing the plane and the cold of Chicago in the middle of winter. That will take me a good five to six weeks to complete. From there, who knows.

I’m also a little nervous this time going to Chicago. This is our largest audit for us, and this year my boss is not going. I will be the one managing the audit. This is a little daunting and this is not necessarily my cup of tea. I just want to be a good worker bee and let someone else worry about all of the administrative stuff. Yeah, I’m a little scared at the size of this one.

I’ve been telling people that a lot of changes were coming to my job. Well, as of January 1st, they have, but not all of the ones I expected.

As expected, people were fired, I’m sorry, downsized, from VPs all the way down to the auditors. I wasn’t one of them. However, our territory has been greatly expanded due to the downsizing of employees, so I can now expect a change from 25-30% of my time on the road as it has been to 75-80% travel time. Now I cover all of the way east to Buffalo NY and south to Syracuse NY, also Harrisburg PA and Pittsburgh PA. I’m sure this isn’t everything, but you get the picture.

It’s going to be a heck of a year. Maybe I should have asked Santa for new luggage.

In closing, I want to quote my brother Jim from first thing this morning – Happy Birthday, Elvis!

Where Have You Been?

I know, I know. It's been awhile. But let me tell you, there is a story here.

First, we had a great Christmas. On my first day of vacation, we headed to Mike and Jenny's for my family's Christmas party. Hey, throw in family, kids, laughs, great food and how can you go wrong? Unfortunately Jim had to leave early for work, but other than that hitch, I think a great time was had by all.

Ron and I made it home that evening, even stopped at my office to drop stuff off on the way. I was ready for the rest of my ten days of rest and relaxation.

Well, have you ever heard the term be careful what you wish for? I am now a firm believer.

A few days after the party, it started with Ron. One heck of a case of the creeping cruds. I am about two days behind him. We spent the rest of my vacation and then some flat on our backs and not in a good way. Luckily, before I went down for the count, I made a big pot of Mom's bean soup. It was totally awesome! Had some serious gas side effects, but luckily we couldn't smell anything anyway.

The soup kept us going for a few days. After that, it was all about delivery. We have this nice book that holds all of our take out menus, separated by ethnicity of food. We had deliveries for a few days, with instructions to put the food on the porch and step away from the sick people!

Unfortunately, the Fedex guy showed up the one day and insisted on someone opening the door. Picture me, having had no shower in a few days, hair is every which way but down, in my night shirt, a quilt sort of wrapped around me, showing up at the door with a croaking "WHAT?" I'm sure he may still be having nightmares about that sight! That will teach him to wake me up from a nap.

So, our New Year's did not start out well. We did stay up until midnight and toasted each other with a shot of Theraflu. Ok, it's not tequila, but it was what we needed. The champagne will stay in the fridge until we are up to having our noses tickled.

Here we are, at January 4th and I've finally faced my first day of work in 2007. I was supposed to be down in Columbus on Tuesday. I was so sure I'd make it I even packed my bag on Monday night. It's still packed and ready to go next Monday. I've had to waste two sick days already, and I really could have used another one today. I made it in for a few hours though, and did handle some phone calls. Whoopie.

For at least another week, I'd recommend everyone staying away. Although, if anyone has soup, just leave it on the porch and back away from the door. Trust me, it's for your own good.

This And That

It was an interesting day yesterday.

My colleague and I went for lunch at a fast food restaurant. We are wearing our stick on badges that say “visitor” along with our names, our company names, and the person’s name that authorized us to be in the building. We get them printed every morning and have to wear them through out the day. If you take them off at lunch, they will not restick, so we just wear them out to lunch.

We are at the counter ordering our lunch and one of the ladies behind the counter seemed to be fascinated by our badges. She kept staring at mine, and then at my colleague’s. Finally, she couldn’t take it anymore and had to ask.

She asked why we wore badges and if they were for the hospital. I looked her dead in the eye and told her that no, we were not with the hospital. We were in the Witness Protection Program and we were here visiting to see if this is the area we wanted to be our new home. She looked at me wide-eyed and just said wow!

My partner thought that was pretty funny and to be honest, I think he almost peed his pants over that. This poor woman probably went home and told her family that she just met two people in the Witness Protection Program!

Ok, that got me through the afternoon.

Then last night, I went for dinner. I was at a steak place, Uno Chicago Grill. What goes good with steak? A nice cold beer! I ordered a beer with dinner and this guy actually carded me. ME. I am WELL over the age of 21. And I thought I was a good liar.

Oh well. Anyone that can shovel crap as well as he did deserved that huge tip I left him.

It definitely was an interesting day.

Now I want to add an addendum to yesterday’s post about compliments and complaints.

I believe in tips also. When I go into a restaurant, I go in with the idea that I’m tipping 20% for the meal. The tip will go up or down from there, depending on the service for the meal. I’ve been known to tip more than the meal was worth, and I’ve also been known to leave a dime. But usually, I’m good for at least 20%. Hence, why the guy last night got a whopping tip for lying to me about my age!

Another place I always tip is at the hotel. To be honest, I always tip, and again, it goes up and down depending on how the room is when I get back. Sometimes I leave a tip for the housekeeper every morning, sometimes at the end of the stay and sometimes here and there throughout the stay. It really depends on what kind of cash I have on me at the time.

I know I didn’t leave a tip Tuesday morning, nor did I leave one Wednesday morning, just because all I had was a $20. So, this morning when I left, I now had smaller money in my wallet. I left a nice tip for her, as she really does an excellent job here every day.

Here was a first for me – when I got back to my room tonight, she left me a thank you note! WOW! I didn’t think the tip was THAT good, but she felt that she wanted to thank me. Now that left me speechless.

You can bet on my way out of here in the morning, I will ask to speak to the manager when I check out and let him know that Sandra has done a fabulous job with my room every day. And, she made my day. That ain’t always easy to do.

I Do Love To Complain

Some people have even said it is part of my DNA, to complain. They may be right. Then again, I’m just as quick to compliment, so hopefully in the cosmic scheme of things, it evens out.

I just believe that service should mean just that. Service. I have e-mailed a manager to compliment the greeter at Sam’s Club, who is a little retired lady that always hugs me and Ron when we walk in. She is just too cute and has a smile for everyone. A genuine smile. I’ve written a complimentary comment card on a lady who used to work at the deli counter at Giant Eagle for graciously putting up with me and helping me with my choices when I didn’t know what the heck I wanted. And, I’ve personally called the manager at a restaurant to tell them how impressed I was with one of their waiters who had waited on us the night before. I had been so impressed with not only his professionalism but also his quick wit and personality in dealing with us all night. This list could go on and on.

Those are my favorite calls. Sometimes, the unheralded masses among us go about doing their jobs day in and day out with little reward or praise. A call or an e-mail to a manager most times makes it back to the employee. At least then they know that someone appreciates their talent for service.

On the other hand, I’m also quick to jab when I feel something is terribly amiss. This list also is too long to mention them all. Like I said in the beginning, I do love to complain.

When I was home last weekend, I picked up the last gift I needed to get for Christmas. It was a gift card to a restaurant. I don’t want to mention which restaurant, just because the receiver hasn’t received the present yet, and if I mention what restaurant, it may spoil the surprise!

Anyway, Ron and I stopped into the restaurant on Friday night well after any dinner rush hour. I said I wanted a gift certificate. The gentleman behind the counter basically told me to just go away as he couldn’t help me. They just got new gift cards and he didn’t have any idea how to work them. Of course, I asked for a manager, who perhaps would know more than he does. Then he dropped the bomb that indeed, he was the manager. I made a comment I shouldn’t have about the quality of people they are hiring that would tell a customer to just leave since they don’t know how to do their job. He said oh well, and basically don’t let the door hit me in the ass on the way out.

In case any body missed it, I was also born with a temper. I’m pissed. I am in no mood to go traipsing through town looking for another branch of this restaurant, nor am I in a mood to come up with a back up plan on a gift, so I basically said to Ron to just take me home.

Saturday coming home from the Christmas party, I decided to be brave and try again. We did find another branch of this restaurant and went in for the gift card. This time, a young lady was the victim, I mean employee, that I had to deal with.

When I told her that I wanted a gift card, this time I got an explanation. She said that corporate had just changed the way they did gift cards, and that no one had been trained on the new procedure yet. Oh, great. But, she added that if I could hang in there, she’d give it a shot and try to figure it out. Hello? Is this service I see? She wasn’t even a manager, just an employee. I told her about the manager at the other location, so if she was willing to give it a try, she could take her time and I would wait patiently.

She tried a bunch of things but so far nothing. Then she actually picked up a phone and called someone (I think another employee based on the way she was talking) and that person actually talked her through the process. The gift card was purchased, and I thanked her profusely for digging in and getting it done.

When I got home, I went to the restaurant’s website and found the magical button that says “contact us” and away I went.

I explained how one manager told me to “go away” and one employee said “I don’t know but I’ll try to figure it out”. Even if I never heard another word about it, sometimes just the writing of the e-mail can make me feel better about it.

I just received a phone call from the Regional Manager of the chain. He thanked me for writing and said that the “go away” manager will be given a talking to. I’m jiggy with that. I reminded him that the second part of the e-mail stated that he had also had an employee with a get it done attitude and she should be commended. He assured me that he would also be talking to her.

Two hits with one e-mail – awesome!

Make It Work

You know, a blank sheet of paper can be a terrifying sight. I’m looking at one now, so I should know.

Some blogs just write themselves. Others, I have to work out in my head awhile because all I have going is a few catch phrases to work with. Other times, I have a lot of ideas, but none of them fit to print. And, other days I have nothing to write about but just feel like writing. Who knew that it could be this tough? I really don’t think I have anything to say, so I’m just going to start rambling about nothing.

Let’s talk about yesterday. I checked into my hotel after work, all set for an evening of watching the finale of Survivor that was originally broadcast on Sunday night on Innertube. I don’t know that I can explain Innertube for the one or two people that might not know about it. All I know is that I can watch the full episodes of Survivor that I’ve missed, and see them with very, very few commercials. Instead of 20 minutes worth of commercials in an hour time slot, I see maybe two minutes worth. That isn’t bad.

Anyway, I had planned last night to order a pizza and sit back and catch up on the finale that I missed. So far, so good. Pizza was the best pizza around, a Donato’s pepperoni pizza on a thin crust and to wash it down, a glass of cool refreshing diet Pepsi. It can’t get much better than this.

Then it happened. I lost the internet connection. AARGH. My room happens to have a router right in there, so I did what I know how to do best. First I made sure the lights on the router were lit, then I called the front desk. That’s the extent of my expertise. I was hoping that the front desk would say that the internet mysteriously went down for a bit, but that they were working on it and would get back to me. No such luck. She ended up calling tech support and patching me through to them. Bad idea. I talked to David in tech support, who probably by the end of the conversation, wished he’d called in sick last night.

Some people know what they are doing on a computer. I’m not one of them. Poor David found that out in a hurry.

David: What kind of a lap top do you have?
Me: The kind you use for work.
David: Well, that’s good, but what KIND is it?
Me: Black?

That gives you a little hint as to how this conversation was going.

After making me do things I didn’t want to do (for the record, I should never be allowed to click any option that says “advanced”), in his infinite wisdom my wireless card either shut itself off for some reason or it broke completely.

After all that, he eventually told me that he could not help me any more, that I’d have to contact my own IT department. Unfortunately, that was not something I could do at 7:30 pm on a Monday night. Ron offered to talk me through what he could, but by this time I was too frazzled to listen. I needed an easier option.

The front desk ended up calling me to see if tech support was able to get me up and running. After some quick thinking, I said to her, hey look, I have a ton of work to do here and I need to get back on line. What are my options? She didn’t need to know I was having a Survivor-attack!

One option was an external wireless card. I’ve had to use those before and sometimes I get them to work, and sometimes I don’t. With the way things were going, I was betting this wasn’t going to be a successful alternative.

My other option was to change rooms, to one that is hard wired for the internet. Since one was available, I chose this option. Only bad part was that I had to repack by suitcase, grab the left over pizza as well as the rest of my soda from the refrigerator and get a move on. The front desk was nice enough to bring my new key along with a rolling luggage cart to me so I packed my laptop, my suitcase and my pizza and I was off, moving up to the next higher floor.

After hanging my clothes up once again, I was back in search of Survivor. I was able to finish the show with relative ease. That’s a lot of self-created angst just to watch a stupid show. Especially when my personal favorite survivor is not the one that walked away with the $1 million prize.

After all that drama, the rest of my evening was spent harmlessly watching Miami Ink. Look out . . . THIS show may be the cause of a blog with pictures one of these days . . .

Update: I got to the hotel tonight and now the wireless is working perfectly. Go figure!

Christmas Party, Part 1

We celebrated Christmas with Ron’s family this past Saturday. What a great time it turned out to be!

One thing I really like about their Christmas gathering is that every year it’s different. I know, that is a far cry from my own past. Every year, we would have the same food, the same people, sitting in the same place. As much as I love bubulki, when you are forced to leave the old traditions behind, sometimes even seeing a hint of what used to be can be painful. That’s what makes his family’s parties so awesome. There is no such thing as tradition!

Every year, someone else will host the Christmas party. Who ever hosts, decides on a theme for that year. The year we hosted, we chose comfort food as our theme. So, our Christmas dinner was all that food that gives you warm fuzzies. We had meatloaf, cabbage and noodles, spaghetti and meatballs, just to name a few. An eclectic mix, but I thought it was awesome.

This year was a western theme. The hosts, Ron’s cousin Sara Beth and her husband Raoul, provided the brisket and the smoked turkey. C’mon, with a start like this, how can the meal not be fantastic? In previous years, we’ve had Christmas around the world, where everyone chose a food from different countries (of course, I chose Czechoslovakia and made halupki!), and last year was an old fashioned Christmas theme.

Regardless of the theme, when families that love each other come together for good food and good cheer, then all is right with the world.

As with my family, the little ones of the family seem to have shot up like weeds in the few months since we’ve seen everyone. I think they all made out with great hauls from the family Santas.

One of the best stories from Saturday was with Ron and his great-niece McKenna. She is 20 months old, and just as cute as cute can be with her huge eyes and ringlet curls. She got a pop up book for Christmas that also had buttons on the side that when pushed would play a corresponding tune to go with the page you were on.

After she opened her book, she brought it to Uncle Ron to read it to her. She climbed up on his lap, put a thumb in her mouth, her head back against Ron’s shoulder and she was ready. He read to her, and showed her how to press the buttons to make the little songs play. Then, he sang softly to her along with the one song. That was it. She was hooked! As soon as the song finished, she pressed the button for one more time. That happened quite a few more times before she’d let Ron off the hook from singing. It was so cute to see the two of them snuggled up like that.

It was a great day. I ate too much, laughed a lot, and got to get hugs from everyone. The best part of all that is we get to do it all over again this Saturday when we join my family at Mike and Jenny’s for another Christmas feast!

I’ll make a prediction: The kids will have grown since I’ve seen them last, they’ll haul in some great Christmas booty, I’ll eat too much, laugh a lot and get a lot of hugs. I could get used to these kinds of Saturdays.

Bonus Prize

After work hours around here, about every week or so, an outside company comes in to water all of the plants. That’s really quite a job around here since there are a ton of plans suspended from the ceiling plus planted on top of cubicle walls.

They roll around a 55 gallon drum like contraption that is full of water and fill their watering cans from that. I was talking to the plant lady last night while she was watering and I was packing up my stuff for the night. They really do a great job with the upkeep as the plants are all gorgeous.

After a brief chat, she went her way and I continued packing up. When I made my way towards the front door, I saw the same lady picking up the huge poinsettia plants from the lobby and packing them up on a cart. Jokingly I said to her “aha! That’s how you keep them all looking so great! You just keep bringing fresh ones in!”

Wrong I was. She was packing them up as requested because this company decided they didn’t want them in the lobby. So the plant lady asked me if I wanted one. What the heck, free is my favorite price so I said sure! She handed me a gorgeous red poinsettia plant which I carried right out the door to my car. Bonus.

Right now, my bonus prize is sitting on the coffee table in my hotel room. Here’s hoping that I remember to put it in my car tomorrow or else the cleaning lady will be going home with my poinsettia.

Who Made Up That Rule?

My license plate for my car expires on my birthday in January. In Ohio, if the year of your actual birth falls in an odd year, then on odd year renewals you must get an emissions test before you can renew your plate. Same if you were born in an even year, then even year renewals you must get this test.

If I get my test done today, it is in the state’s system by tomorrow, and I can go ahead and renew my plate online and receive the appropriate sticker in the mail in about a week. That’s when all works according to plan.

With traveling, this is one thing I have kinda let slip by. Being gone Monday through Friday makes it tough sometimes to get things done. Well, silly me, I figured I’m still in the state of Ohio, so I’ll just find a local emissions testing facility down here and have it done here.

Yesterday, I left work a little early to go have this done. Since I only know how to get to the job site and from there to the hotel and back, I had to ask the receptionist here for directions to the closest emissions testing facility. She looked at me as if I’d asked her how to find Martians.

I went through the spiel of testing done before license plate renewals. She looked like she had a spark of recognition and directed me to a place that sounded like it was only 6 or 7 blocks away. Not only didn’t I find an emissions testing facility, I couldn’t find my way back to the main road that would take me to the freeway to the hotel! I was screwed.

I wasted a lot of gas in neighborhoods I shouldn’t have been in by myself after dark when finally I spotted a familiar site. I finally knew where I was. Then my phone rang; my boss was calling.

I pulled over into a parking lot to talk to him. He asked me what was happening, if anything was going on over where I was. I told him the whole story of leaving early, trying to find the testing place and having just gotten myself un-lost. He did laugh a little, and then informed me that the emission testing is only done in the Cleveland area. NOT in the Columbus area or anywhere else in this state. What?? That’s a stupid rule. Why should only one small area of the entire state have to subject themselves to this testing? As far as the receptionist was concerned, I was asking for Martians. No wonder she gave me such a look. And, in case anyone was wondering, she gave me directions to the license renewal office. That’s why I didn’t find it, since that is not what I was looking for.

The funny thing is this morning when I went in, the first thing the receptionist asked me was if I found the place I was looking for. So, I had to tell her the story of getting lost, of talking to my boss only to find out there is no such creature in the Columbus area. Ok, we both got a good laugh out of it. But it’s still a stupid rule.

You Want Me To Do What?

I am a decent driver. I still don’t like to drive, but I’m decent at it. I can back up my car, and I can even parallel park when I have to. I do a good three point turn in my drive way so that I can drive out facing the street. Last night, I was even able to drive up on a curb to avoid the guy that went into oncoming traffic (that would be into my lane) because obviously he was tired of waiting in a long line of cars. See? I’m decent at driving.

However, there are certain things that I will not do.

I used to take my car to one of those oil change places where there is a crew in a pit in the basement of the business. You drive your car over a hole in the floor, and the crew below is able to drain your oil without putting the car up on a lift. I refused to drive it in over that pit. I would get out of my car, and trust one of the kids at the facility to drive my car over the hole. Hey, if my car is going down, I’m not going down with it.

Some BP gas stations have a good car wash. The one by my house that I go to, you get your code when you pay for the car wash, drive up to the door, enter the code and the bay door opens. You drive in until a red light in front of you says stop. From there, put your car in park, let the machine do its thing and when the red light turns green, I drive out the other end with a cleaner car than I drove in with. It’s not perfect but it’s better than doing it by hand. It’s so simple even I can do it.

Due to the weather at home last weekend, my car has been filthy with the salt from the road. Every time I get in or out of the car wearing dark pants, I get that salt residue on the back of my pants. One of the things that I wanted to do over the weekend was to get my car washed. Unfortunately, that cycle of nap/watch TV/nap/watch TV took over my body on Sunday and I accomplished nothing. So, I drove down here in a filthy car, continuing to get my pants dirty every time I get in and out of the car.

There is a BP station right down the street from where I am working. I figured that after work, I’d gas up and get a car wash on the way to the hotel. That sounds easy, right? At first it was. I gassed up, chose the car wash I wanted right from the pump, received my access code and drove over to the gate. I punched in my code and then that’s when I saw it. There in front of me to the left was a track that is supposed to grab your wheel and pull you through the damn car wash. Who of you that can read this really believes that “I” can do this?

They have a nice round mirror outside pointed at the entrance to the track that your tire is to drive into. Unfortunately, my side view mirror is pretty much obstructing the entire mirror. I tried as hard as I could, but with it being dark outside and the placement of my mirror, I couldn’t see a damn thing.

When the left front side of my car actually started to go up into the air, I figured I just missed that channel and was driving up onto the edge of it. Ok, I can fix that. I backed up until I was level, moved what I thought was just a little bit over to the left, and then I heard the SCCCRRRAAAAAPPPPPPEEEEEE. Hmm. That can’t be good. In hindsight this morning, I should have gotten out of my car and looked for myself just where I was in relation to where I needed to be. Nah. That would be the easy way out. I jiggled the wheel until I could feel it inside of the track and that awful scraping sound quit. Then, I put the shift in neutral and was pulled through the carwash all the while wondering what the heck my wheel would look like when I got through to the other side.

At the end, you finally come to a red light that tells you not to move as you finish up with their version of a blow dryer. When the green light finally came on, I pulled up and out of the way of the doors and machinery and got out to look at my wheel. Again, it was dark outside, so I really couldn’t see any problems. I had a tire and a hubcap. It looked good to me.

In the light of day this morning, I do see that the hubcap is bent a little, with a nice scrape around about half of it. At least I had the good sense God gave a slug to stop as soon as I could when I heard the scrape and not let the car go all the way through that way.

C’mon BP! Let’s try a bigger mirror! Or maybe a little light there so I could see better. Or please at least have some kid directing me from outside “a little to the left, a little to the right”. Don’t make me do this on my own! Oh well. That’s the last time I go to that BP station for a car wash. They really should warn people that morons should not use this equipment.

You’d Think It Was Christmas or Something

I think we had a really good weekend over at our house.

I actually got an extra day at home last week, so that helped. I came back to town Thursday night so that I could have a day in my local office to catch up on administrative duties. I needed that break.

Saturday started off slowly. Ron made us breakfast, and it was pretty much Pogo and DVR time. That’s always a good start to a Saturday. Saturday afternoon, Ron scored great boyfriend points in willingly going with me to finish my Christmas shopping. Even though our day was filled with necessary stops, we were able to fit in a few bonus stops as well.

The highlight of Saturday for me was that since we were over by Great Northern Mall shopping, we had lunch at one of my favorite places! Chipotles! I swear if it was closer to our house, I’d eat there four times a week at least. You can’t beat their chicken fajita burrito in my honest opinion. It’s all you need to sustain life, wrapped in a fresh flour tortilla. Mmm.

Between the awesome lunch and the new sneakers I bought myself at Payless Shoes it was a bearable day fighting the lunatics on the road by the mall.

After the shopping excursion, Ron and I hunkered down and got to the wrapping end of gift buying. We had a great system set up with Ron on one side of the table and me on the other side.

I measured and cut the wrapping paper for each present and then handed it over to Ron who worked his magic with it and made it all beautiful and wrapped. By the time we went to bed, we were exhausted. It was a long but very successful day.

Sunday was a total relaxation day to recover from Saturday’s shopping! Again, it started off with breakfast ala Ron. From there, I stretched out on the recliner and Ron took over the couch. The TV was tuned to the Comedy Channel. The entire day was spent napping for 15 minutes, watching whatever was on for 15 minutes. This repeated itself throughout the day; nap, watch TV, nap, watch TV, etc. For as much sleep as I got Sunday afternoon and evening, I can’t believe that I actually fell asleep last night and even stayed asleep most of the night! I must have needed that battery recharging.

So now, we are as ready for Christmas as we can be. This coming Saturday we will celebrate with Ron’s family. The following Saturday with be with my family. Then a few well deserved vacation days for me. Unless you want to hear about more napping and watching TV, don’t expect great blogs that week! Because that’s exactly how I am planning on spending my vacation. Only 11 more days to go.

On A Lighter Note

On a lighter note, Thursday morning when I was leaving the hotel, I almost picked me up a new boyfriend!

The hotel I was staying at has their lobby on the 7th floor of the building. The first six floors are the parking lot for the hotel. So, from the parking garage, you take the elevator up to the 7th floor, cross the lobby and take that bank of elevators up to the next ten floors where the rooms are.

As I was leaving the hotel for the day, I was waiting on my floor for the elevator to take me down to the lobby. The doors opened, and an elderly gentleman who was struggling on crutches started to walk out of the elevator. I know how it is when you’re daydreaming in an elevator. As soon as it stops, you assume you’re in the lobby and start to leave. I had a feeling that’s what happened with this gentleman. I asked him if he was looking for the lobby, because if he was, this wasn’t it. He laughed at his oversight and said indeed, he had been daydreaming and assumed this was his floor.

He backed up into the elevator and I stepped on as well. We chatted about the fact that both of us had done that same thing at one time or another in the past. Then, this gentleman said to me, “do you ever notice that people just don’t talk to each other in an elevator anymore?” I replied that of course I noticed that, but as you can tell, I’m not one of those people! So we chatted a bit more on the way to the lobby about the book I was carrying in my hand.

When we got to the lobby, I let him get out first and together, we made our way across the lobby to the next bank of elevators that would take us to the parking garage. He pushed the down button and said “are you ready sweetheart?” Silly me, I assumed he was still talking to me! So I said something like I was as ready as I was going to be. As I walked closer to the elevator, I finally saw his wife who was standing behind a pillar waiting for him! Ok, I had to laugh.

I told him that I was actually arrogant enough to believe that he was calling ME sweetheart! I have a feeling that this guy has spent his lifetime talking to ladies because he and his wife got a chuckle out of that. Then he said to me that his wife would always be his sweetheart, but if it was ok with me, I would be his honey. Hey, we can never have too many honeys in our lives, so I readily agreed to it.

The three of us ambled into the elevator where they got off of the elevator first. In unison, the both of them turned to look at me before the doors closed and they said “bye honey! Have a nice day!”

Dang it, that made my day. And, Ron better watch out! There is a 75 year old honey down here that has his eyes on me!

Parenting 101, AKA That’s Just Wrong Page 9

I think I have been blessed in knowing some great Moms in my life, starting with my own. Add to that fact, the young mothers in our family now, who I believe are both doing a fantastic job raising their families. When you see a great mom in action, it makes it that much harder to believe any other kind can exist.

Two instances have happened recently.

During the week, I am traveling for work. I eat many meals alone. When you are dining alone, it is not uncommon to be placed in a booth in a bar room, rather than take up an entire table in a dining room. I’m usually ok with that.

A couple of weeks ago, I went to a BBQ place just around the corner from the job site. I was given a booth in the bar room. Bellying up to the bar were three young “ladies”, one of whom was holding a very small child. I am guessing a couple of months old at best. This young mom had left the diaper bag behind her at one of the empty booths. She jumped off of her bar stool long enough to go to the diaper bag for a bottle for the baby. I watched as she sat at the bar, feeding the baby a bottle while she sucked down a few margaritas.

As much of a fan of margaritas as I am (just look at the title of this blog!) I had trouble with this scene. I don’t know anything about having or raising children, so for all I know, a few margaritas is a necessity in getting through a day. Heaven knows I’ve felt that way even without having kids. I watched her in disbelief and hoped this behavior was just a fluke. .

Last night, I went to a steak place. Again, sitting in a booth in the bar room, I was astounded to see a young couple walk in with a baby in one of them carrying kind of car seats. Well, I wasn’t surprised to see them walk into a restaurant with the baby, but I was surprised at what they DID with the baby.

I was assuming they were going to one of the open booths in the area. I assumed wrong. They chose a couple of bar stools at the bar. Where did the baby go? The baby was placed on the floor in between them of course. After a minute, mom gets off of her bar stool, brings the baby carrier up and placed it on that bar stool. Aha! Mom just put the baby down a minute to get herself situated. That can’t be a bad thing. I am starting to feel better about it. I watch as mom loosens the baby’s snow suit, coos at her for a bit, then . . . . you guessed it . . . . she put baby and car seat back on the floor between the bar stools. Hello??? Mom and I am assuming Dad, then planted their butts on the bar stools and had a beer.

Which is the proper etiquette? Do you hold the baby in your arms at the bar and feed it while you drink? Or do you leave it on the floor, hopefully out of the way while you throw back a few brews? No, sorry. That’s just wrong.

Surprise!

Saturday night, we were invited to a surprise birthday party. We all know how much I love birthdays! And for this party, we were an important part of the whole surprise process. That’s just an added bonus for me.

The game plan was that we were going over to Larry and Linda’s for a quiet dinner and some games. The truth was that about 20 people or so was showing up to celebrate Larry’s birthday that was a few days before. Now, the issue became how to get him out of the house.

That was Ron’s job. He and I threw around a few ideas on Saturday morning of what would motivate Larry to spend the afternoon with Ron. That’s not usually a difficult thing to do, but it had to be believable from the get go and something Larry couldn’t back out of. Larry is all about coming over to help Ron with projects on the house, but I was afraid that a last minute “project” could be postponed by Larry for another weekend. No, it had to be something he couldn’t refuse. What could it be?

Harley shopping. Simple, but effective! The only problem with that was unbeknownst to the guys, the local Harley shop closed at 4:00 p.m. That left them with very little time to drool, I mean shop. Since we couldn’t let Larry go home until around 6:00 p.m., Ron had to try to kill two hours with him before they could come back all without making him suspicious. Somehow, he talked Larry into Christmas shopping. The bad part about that is that Ron beat me getting all of his shopping done. I should have given him my list too!

So, the two guys spent the afternoon Christmas shopping. Ron tried to stall as long as he could but guys can only shop for so long if there isn’t a Harley involved. At the end, Larry got home before everyone was able to get to his house, but that was ok. The look on his face every time someone else came to the party made the surprise part of this party last a lot longer.

It turned out to be a great party. No police were called; I guess that just means we are all getting older and quieter. No injuries, no police. And we still called it a party! Anytime that good friends and good food show up at the same place, it’s definitely a party.

What’s In A Dream

Who remembers making soup noodles with Mom? Well, last night, that’s exactly what I dreamed about doing.

As a kid, my job was always to keep cranking. Mom and/or Aunt Mary would do all of the working with the dough. They would take the small dough packages and put them through the noodle maker, each pass making dough into a longer and thinner strip. I cranked, and was allowed to adjust the machine to thin the dough with each pass through. Finally, when it was the right size, Mom would cut the long strips across into inch or inch and a half wide pieces. These pieces would be fed through one by one to cut the individual noodles. Again, I was tending the crank, but at this part, I would also be allowed to feed the pieces of dough into the machine, as long as I would put them in straight.

Funny what we remember as we get older. It must be a good 20 years or so since I’ve helped with this task. Even as I got older, my position in the noodle making process never changed. I cranked, adjusted the machine and got to cut the final pieces into noodles. And, of course, sprinkle the cut noodles onto a sheet that was placed on all of the beds to give the noodles a place to dry.

This process is not something I have ever done on my own. To be honest, I don’t think I’ve thought much about it in the last 20 years. But, last night in my dream, I was the noodle maker. Mom was there, telling me what to do. Unfortunately, what she was telling me did not end up being done as she told me. In my dream, I was the one trying to feed the dough into the machine to make the long thin strips. What came out was just about everything but. Mom couldn’t figure out how in the heck I was going to get noodles out of the mess I was making!

The sounds and the smells all came back in the dream. If I think about it hard enough right now, I can still smell the flour. Or taste what the raw dough tastes like. C’mon now, we’ve all snitched a few pieces of the raw dough. That was half the fun of helping. I remember the little pan that caught the cut noodles. I can feel the noodles in my hand as I take them and spread them out on the beds for drying.

I don’t know if I’ll ever run out and buy a noodle making machine and make my own home made noodles. But at least for a little while in my dream, I was back to when life was easier, spending an afternoon with Mom making noodles. And that ain’t a bad way to dream the night away.

You Never Know When I’ll Be Listening

My job is a strange job some days.

There are three of us on this audit. At some places we audit, we are given private offices. Other places will set aside a conference room for us. And, still other places will just put us wherever they have an empty cubicle. Any of the scenarios work for me.

Where we are now, we are in three empty cubicles. We are all spaced pretty far apart, in with three separate groups of people. Since only two of the cubicles have computers to get into our client’s systems, we end up playing musical chairs since all three of us will need access throughout the audit.

While sitting in the various cubicles, here are some of the conversations I’ve had to listen to from the people around me with the thoughts that went through my head when I heard them:

---> “C’mon honey, please fold the towels in the dryer for me. I know, but I bet you can do it. Just go to the dryer, take them out and fold them. That’s all you need to do. Ok, ok, never mind. I’ll do it. No, I won’t tell Dad that you didn’t do them.” (Hmm. Take out fold the towels and insert any other chore and it’s about the same conversation. I’ve heard it about homework, picking up her room, etc. Very interesting! Me thinks someone has Mom wrapped tightly around her finger!)

---> “I’m going to meet him at the club tonight. I’ll just start humping his leg while we’re dancing and see if he gets the hint that I want to get laid.” (Is this how you pick up men now a days?)

--->“You think you’re delivery was bad, I went out for dinner before going to the hospital so that by the time I got to the hospital, there wasn’t time to do an enema! You should have seen the mess I made! Ewww!!” (There is absolutely nothing I want to add to this one!)

---> “My divorce was so bad; I actually threw a party when it was finalized! What a crazy night that was! I can’t believe how drunk I was!” (I guess any reason to party.)

---> “Hey, I can’t find something in the phone book. Is the U.S. Post Office under government?” (Um, last I looked, that U.S. part stood for United States. Yeah, I’d look under government.)

This is just a sampling! Please, if you’re sitting in a cubicle, remember the people around you hear your phone conversations as well as your conversations with your coworkers. Keep in mind, you never know when someone else is listening. That someone else could be me! And trust me, I don’t want to hear the stories of how it would have been easier if you had that enema before delivering your child. Yeah, that’s a story I could have lived the rest of my life without ever hearing. Ewww.

My Bad. No, Really - My BAD

Some days I have more of Mom in me than I care to admit.

I got back to town on Wednesday afternoon and pretty much did nothing the rest of that day. Then, Thursday morning was spent making sure the house was presentable for company. Mostly, I just had to get rid of all of the mail that has accumulated on the table. I made three piles for the mail. One pile was the bills that had to be paid, one pile was for Ron’s stuff and one pile was for stuff to be thrown out. This worked in theory.

Last night, I sat down to pay all of the bills that were stacked in pile one. Ron was going through pile two to look for his expense check that was on the table so he could get a deposit ready to go into the bank. Poor guy looked and looked and looked. Guess what? No check.

So I helped him look. And we looked. And then we looked some more. His check wasn’t in my pile, it wasn’t in his pile and it wasn’t left on the dining room table. Only other option was that it was pile three – the pile that was thrown out.

Hey, when I pick up the table, I pick up the table.

Sorry, honey. My bad.

Week In Review

I know, I know. I was a slacker last week. With the holiday, there just wasn’t the time to sit and write a whole lot.

I had to travel to the audit site by myself last week. My other two associates decided against the trip for the short week for one reason or another. Other than getting lost heading to the hotel, there wasn’t much to note.

For the record, if the picture on the internet of the hotel is shown from one side of the road, that’s where it should be when I’m driving up to it. The internet showed my hotel to be on the right side of the street. However, when I was driving up and down, I was looking on that side, only to find out later, through a phone call to the hotel nonetheless, that the hotel was actually on the other side of the street. That’s a hard one to admit. And, it’s not like it was a dinky building, either. It was a 20 story high-rise in the middle of downtown (my room was on the 18th floor, thank you very much!) but somehow I still missed it. I shouldn’t be allowed out alone.

The work week went by quickly as I was only away for three days. Then the fun began!

Dad and Jim were nice enough to brave the crazy people and the traffic to head to our house on Thursday. Since they did all of that, I made sure they didn’t have to eat turkey. I know neither of the guys appreciates the delicate tastes of one of my favorite meals, so I decided to make one of their favorite meals. I got a half of a ham and cooked it up. It honestly turned out to be one of the best hams I ever made. A bottle of Bud Lite in with the ham was all it took. And, since we all know how good cabbage goes with ham, as a side dish, we had another family favorite, fried cabbage and noodles. Good eats at our house this holiday for sure.

Friday, Ron and I headed to Erie and had a day of visiting. Maura was in town with her husband for a fast weekend trip so we met up together at one of our old hangouts and had a nice lunch. I’m telling you, a lunch was not enough time to spend with my good friend. I miss her to death and the hug good bye was definitely difficult. But, at least a lunch visit was better than nothing.

After lunch, Ron and I even got to stop in and chit chat with Aunt Mary! She is still cute as the dickens for sure. Aunt Mary hugs are some of the best you can get. Unfortunately, we had just come from lunch with Maura so we had to decline the offer of pie. That’s just wrong on a lot of levels. No one should ever say no to pie. So, I took extra hugs instead and all was well with my world.

After a nice visit with Aunt Mary, we headed to see Dad before we left town. After spending more quality time with Dad and Jim, we finally hit the road home. I’m glad Ron was driving, since I not only hate to drive on good days, but with the holiday traffic mixed in, it would have made me a bit crazy. It was much better to just sit back and try to enjoy the scenery.

Saturday we had the chance to catch up with Mike, Mary Jane and their whole family. I’m telling you, even a month or so goes by in between seeing the kids and I can’t believe how many changes in them all. Evan and Isaiah are getting so big! Poor Isaiah though, had a heck of a cold and sure wasn’t up to par. Grady and Noah were the happy little babies mostly content in just watching all that was going on with everyone else. I even tried to pinch the little ones to get a little commotion going on, but they couldn’t be bothered. Life was good, no use in fussing.

Sunday was spent trying to relax and forget about the world for one day before I headed back to reality.

So it was a very busy weekend. It was great to see all of the family that I don’t get to see very often. That’s the best part of any holiday.

It Wasn't ME!

This is one for the record books! Mainly just because it wasn't ME this time!

Ron at this very moment is cooking us lunch. I'm upstairs watching my DVR and playing on the computer. What do I hear?? The smoke alarm right in the hallway outside of this room! Blaring for all it's worth. This is not a test. This is the real thing!

Ron yells up the steps and says "oops! Lunch is almost ready!" I reached up to the smoke alarm up here and took out the battery and said "I gotta blog about this!" So, here we are.

(Another smoke alarm just started going off! This is a TWO alarm lunch!)

Hey, it's not an unusual thing for a smoke alarm to go off while I'm cooking. Trust me, that's how I usually know the meal is ready to eat. But, in 3-1/2 years that Ron and I have lived together, this is the first time that HE set off the smoke alarms! Way to go honey!

I knew if he hung around me long enough I'd rub off on him. Welcome to my world honey! I'm proud of you!!

p.s. Lunch was turkey mignon, pierogis and corn. It was delicious!! Great job honey!

What's On Your Amazon Wish List?

I am a sucker for Amazon.com. Not only do I do most of my Christmas shopping via people’s Amazon Wish Lists (thanks Jenny and JoBeth!) but I’m not afraid to indulge myself with a little Amazon goodness as well.

When the last Harry Potter book came out, I was able to pre order the book through Amazon.com. That way, the day the book was released, it was delivered right to my door! It’s hard to beat a deal like that. The only bad thing about that was I was the first person I knew to read that book. There were a lot of exciting things happening in that book. As soon as I finished the book, all I wanted to do was talk about what happened in the book with someone. Anyone! That was hard. But, it was still worth the kick to have the book fresh off the presses without having to wait in any horrible lines.

There are few books I am that passionate about. Another one happens to be a series by Dean Koontz. The first book was named after the title character in the book; Odd Thomas. Yes, the guy’s name was Odd Thomas. The book really took me on a roller coaster ride. I remembered breaking down into absolute sobs at the end of the book. It was gut wrenching. That’s not always a good thing, but I thought the book was just so awesome, it was worth the cry.

Then came the follow up book, Forever Odd. Ron was nice enough to supply me with this one. It didn’t make me cry like the first, but I still thought it was an awesome book. Last night, I just found out that book number three, Brother Odd is due out on November 28th. How could I not know this???

I immediately pointed my browser to Amazon.com and once again pre-ordered the book. I know, I could have put it on my wish list and hoped someone bought it for me. I mean, after all, there is Christmas and my birthday coming up. But why take the chance that everyone would pass up this gem of a gift? No, I couldn’t leave it to chance. I dusted off my credit card and bought it myself. Now to only count the days until November 28th!

So as not to worry anyone, I still have a lot of other items listed on my Amazon Wish List. Please feel free to buy me that plasma flat screen television I have on there, another gem of a gift. I promise to act surprised and not to be disappointed!

That's Just Wrong, Page 8

I’ve been thinking since yesterday if this story is blog-worthy. I know that not all blogs are winners; you should read some of the ones I’ve passed over on posting! The more I thought about this one however, the more I thought that what happened was just wrong.

There is a really nice cafeteria here on site. Breakfast (bagel and orange juice) can be had for about $1.50 and our lunches run around $3.00 each. And, they’re not bad. There are different areas that you go to for different sorts of items. It just so happened that the bagel I got for breakfast yesterday came from the same station from which I picked up my turkey and swiss sandwich for lunch.

The kid manning the counter at breakfast was talkative. That’s no big deal. I’m guessing he’s somewhere in the area of fresh out of high school. I ordered a bagel yesterday, toasted. While it’s toasting, we were chatting.

Every morning, the receptionist prints out name tags for us. She had our business cards, so our name tags have our name, then our company name, and the words “Audit Specialists” under our company name, which she got from our business cards. They are peal and stick labels that go right on our clothes.

While I’m waiting for my bagel to toast, the guy is reading my name tag. He commented that I’m an audit specialist (big whoop) and he kept saying my name over and over. Ok, I started to get a little freaked out. Finally, the bagel was ready, and I got to walk away.

Lunch time came and I wasn’t that hungry. All I wanted was a sandwich. Hence, why I got back in the same line at that counter, instead of one of the lines for some of the cooked food items. Big mistake. As soon as it was my turn and I got up to the counter, he said “hi, Ann Marie! I remember getting your breakfast for you this morning”! Ok, what do you say to that? It was the most perfectly toasted bagel I ever had, thank you??

While he was slapping together my turkey and swiss, he commented that he remembered my name because he had looked so carefully at my name tag that morning. After all, he can’t just look at a person’s face the whole time, he has to look other places. This guy actually said that! How was I supposed to take that? As an insult that he couldn’t look at my face for the two minutes it took to toast my bagel or as a compliment that he’d rather look at my boob for two minutes??

Either way, that was just wrong.

See What's Playing

Last Saturday night, Ron and I went out with some friends of ours, David and Edna. We went for dinner and then to see a movie.

The movie was The Prestige. To be honest, this was not a movie I would have picked out, but majority ruled and that’s what we went to see. I am so glad we did! The movie was awesome! I wish I could write reviews more like other people, but I have no clue as to directors, producers, cinematography or anything like that. I know I enjoyed the movie from beginning to end. Besides, looking at Hugh Jackman for two and a half hours is just a good thing!

This movie did have its share of twists and turns. Usually, my mind needs a little help grasping things like that. I usually need someone explaining some of the twists and turns before I’m up to speed and able to understand a movie! Sad, but true. However, this time, I GOT IT! I can’t believe it! I never get it. I never guess who done it, and I can never see something obvious coming. But not so this time.

After the movie, Edna and I made a stop in the ladies’ room. We’re standing there, washing our hands, when two other ladies in the room were discussing the movie we just saw and they totally didn’t get it. I know I have a big mouth and generally speaking, can’t keep it shut. They were going back and forth asking each other “why this” or “what was that” and I actually KNEW! So, of course, I had to start spouting off.

The four of us stood in that ladies’ room for what seemed like a long time, rehashing the movie. We could have picked a better room, but it was still fun! I never get to be the one to explain anything! The ladies left the room totally getting the movie. I left the room doing a happy dance because I knew the answers to their questions. Edna? Well, she pretty much just shook her head that I’d stand there so long talking to total strangers! Hey, what can I say? I never learned that do not talk to strangers rule.

So, if anyone goes to see The Prestige with Michael Caine and of course, Hugh Jackman, and you have any questions, call me. I got it!!

Phone Call

Most of my days at work are spent arguing with people. Since I audit payments made, I am always arguing about money. On that topic, people tend to argue fiercely. No one wants to pay back money no matter what the reason.

Today was an exception.

I was in a meeting this morning. When I returned to my desk, I saw my work cell phone had a voice mail. Crap. Who wants to argue with me now? So I listened to the voicemail. Here is about how that voicemail sounded that was left on my phone.

“Uh, hi, Ann Marie. My name is Mike and I’m from XYZ Company. I am returning your call from oh . . . about a month ago. I’m not really sure what it is you wanted from me, so maybe you could give me a call today and refresh my memory. I’m in California, where by the way our weather is really lousy right now. It’s cold and rainy. But I guess you don’t want to hear about that. So, um, I know you needed something from me, I just don’t remember what. Again, this is Mike from XYZ Company, phone number 555-555-5555. Give me a call.”

Interesting, huh? I definitely had to call Mike back! Here is kinda how that went.

Riiiiing

Mike: This is Mike.
Me: Hi, Mike. This is Ann Marie with ABC Company.
Mike: Oh, HI! Thanks for calling me back! Some weather, huh?
Me: Laughing. Well, Mike, to be honest, when you tell me you’re from California, I really have a hard time getting my sympathy juices working for you when I’m sitting here in Ohio. You wanna talk weather, we can talk weather!
Mike: Laughing. Yeah, I guess it’s hard for you to care it’s not perfect here, huh?
Me: No, sorry.
Mike: Um, I remember you left me a message awhile ago . . . do you remember why?
Me: Hmm. Was it at least in 2006?
Mike: YEAH!! I’m not that far behind on returning phone calls!
Me: Excellent! Well, hang on then, I’ll look it up! I must have it right here if it’s that current!
(me typing some keys, trying to find his issue in my laptop)
Me: Yep, here it is. I sent you a couple of faxes. I need you to sign one of them and fax it over to me. That’s it.
Mike: Yeah, I got your two faxes, I just wasn’t sure what to do with them.
Me: Sign it and fax it. Simple.
Mike: Yeah, that’s good. I can do that.
Me: Thanks
Mike: So, you’re in Ohio, huh?
Me: Yes, right on Lake Erie.
Mike: So, what are lake effect snows? You ever get any of them?
Me: Oh yeah, we get them. (I tried to explain them, although to be honest, I know what the end effect of a lake effect snow is, but I’m not sure I know exactly what causes it. So, I blabbered a bit about snow.)
Mike: I love snow. From where I’m at, I can see snow up on the mountains. It looks really cool. So pretty and all. You like the snow?
Me: Well, from where I am at, it’s a lot closer than just looking at it on the mountains. I have to shovel it, plow it, and brush it off my car. When it comes to that, it ain’t so pretty anymore!
Mike: Well, I really liked talking with you! Thanks for returning my call and helping me out with your faxes.
Me: Mike, the pleasure was all mine. In fact, I enjoyed our conversation SO much, I’m keeping your number! The next time I’m depressed, I’m calling you for a laugh!
Mike: YEAH! Please do! We can talk about the weather or something!

Ok, neither one of us are rocket scientists, but I liked the guy anyway. I still don’t feel sorry for his “bad” weather in California, but hey, if he signs that paper and faxes it back to be, it’s money in the bank. It’s hard for me to not like anyone that in effect hands over money to me.

All my phone calls should be that easy.

Be On The Look Out

Look closely. Is it me, or does the artist's drawing of the rapist look familiar??

What Will They Think Of Me?

My skin seems to be dryer than normal when I stay in hotels. Whether it’s dirty air filters for all of the circulated air or just the ultra soft water in the showers, I have a hard time with my skin on the road.

One of my rituals before going to bed it taking the little bottle of complimentary body lotion and giving my hands, feet, arms and legs a good dose of some lotion. Last night, when I was done, I left the bottle of lotion on the night side table.

Remember, I have this terrible cold. I also put a lot of tissues on the night side table and some cough drops to get me through the night.

Here is what I saw in the morning on the night table in my hotel room before I left for work:

> Half empty bottle of hand lotion
> A ton of wadded up dirty tissues

Some things are just wrong to think about. The scenario going through my mind of what that could look like was just too much for me. I did not want housekeeping to say “ewww” or heaven forbid, booby trap my room in some way for leaving that “mess” for them. I definitely had to throw out my own tissues and put the lotion back in the bathroom before I left for work.

Too Good To Be True

Other than my cold still kicking my butt, not much to report from yesterday. Last night, I would have paid a drug dealer on the street for some cough syrup with codeine. I’m sure whoever was in the room next to me was not happy with me. I am betting I kept them awake most of the night as well. Sorry!

We did take a little ride around to look at a few other areas. We thought we were getting a good deal at the hotel we are staying at, but later found out about all of the hidden charges they forgot to mention when reservations were made.

For example:

You want to park a car? It’s going to cost $18.00 a day. We have two cars here.
You want high speed internet access? That will be another $9.95 per day.
You want the paper delivered in the morning? $0.75 per day. (Normally the USA Today is delivered for free when you’re a Hilton Honors member)
You want a warm cookie after work when you get back to the hotel? $1.00 per cookie. Again, most hotels offer this as a nice little perk, while supplies last, in the evenings.

Ok the cookie and the newspaper are little issues, but the parking and high speed internet is definitely adding up for two of us. I know it’s a company expense and not my expense, but the company is not exactly running in the black right now, so we are trying to do what we can to not cause the problem to get any worse.

Looks like next week it will be a new adventure of a new hotel. I have a feeling it’s not going to be anywhere near as awesome as this one. It was nice looking out the window and seeing the river across the street or just the hoopla of downtown activity. Then again, who needs those traffic problems early in the morning?

Life On The Road

Yesterday, my drive was mostly uneventful. Trying to cut down the miles on my car, I chose a more direct route down here other than the smart way of taking the freeway all the way. I drove part of the way on a two lane road and then part of the way on a road that wishes it was a two lane road before I finally got to the freeway.

The road that wishes it were a two lane road was CR601. Any road that has country road, aka CR in the road name, I should have figured wasn’t going to be a thoroughfare. I am darn happy I found the road since it had the smallest of signs announcing it.

The best part of this road was I got to drive through when all of the local Amish children happened to be walking to school. The atrocities of the recent shootings in Pennsylvania fresh in my mind, I looked at these innocent beautiful children and just wanted to cry. Most of them seemed so happy to see someone on the road with them, and they waved good morning to me! Ok, that was pretty cool. They are a testament to the “life goes on” theory I guess. It gave me warm fuzzies in my heart for the rest of my drive.

Believe it or not, I found my way to the audit site with only one missed turn. For me, this is a darn good day.

Our hotel is right smack in the middle of downtown. Now I got to tell you, I’ve stayed in some nice hotel rooms before but this one definitely has to be the best of the bunch so far. This is what I love about traveling! All of the rooms in this hotel are suites, not just rooms. This suite I swear is larger than some apartments I’ve had. I could live in this suite with no problem.

You walk in and there is a counter to the left with a microwave, a wet bar and a refrigerator. After that there is a little stone topped table with two chairs. I guess this is the kitchen area. There is an over stuffed chair and ottoman, a sofa and coffee table, a desk and chair and a television. That’s just my living area! Go to the right through some French doors and there are two double beds, a dresser with another TV. Then on the other side of this room is a dressing room, a closet and the bathroom. On the wall next to the beds in the bedroom and on the wall by the desk in the living area are huge picture windows. Did I mention I’m on the 10th floor overlooking downtown? I’m telling you this is way too cool!

When we got to the hotel last night about 6:00 pm, I was standing in the window sort of giggling at even being there. Right across the street from me is an office building. While I was standing in my window looking out, some guy in an office across from me but a couple of floors down was at his window looking up at me. Hey! What’s that about? He kept looking so I finally gave him something to look at. That should cure him of peeping into the hotel across the street for sure. Poor guy probably needs therapy about now. What the heck, he’s never going to see me again and I doubt he could pick me out of a line up anyway!

The only down side of the evening was dinner last night. After I unpacked and relaxed a bit, my boss and I met up for dinner. We got a couple of suggestions from the front desk on where to go for dinner and started walking. We headed for an Italian restaurant about three blocks away.

Nice place, even though it was kind of dark in there. It was really hard to read the menu. But I finally decided on wild mushroom stuffed ravioli in a mushroom sauce. Doesn’t that sound good? It was so awful, it was inedible. It was so salty that even I couldn’t eat it, and I love salt. The waitress wanted to know if I wanted it boxed up and I explained that there is no way I could eat it whether I took it with me or forced it down at the restaurant.

She apologized and sent the manager over. The manager offered to have another meal prepared for me. I didn’t want to start eating now that my boss was done eating, nor did I want to take it back to the hotel. He offered me free dessert which is an offer I usually jump at, but with the bad taste left in my mouth from dinner I didn’t think I could eat that either. So, he did take the offensive meal off of the bill and we called it a night. Oh well, here’s hoping tonight’s fare will be better.

All in all, aside from dinner, it was a good day. I’m still coughing and hacking and blowing my nose which I’m sure all around me are thrilled about. I keep swigging on my cough medicine and hoping for the best.

So much for day one. I’ve been told that I will be traveling for at least the next three months straight. If nothing else, this should be good for the blog. I do love to tell a good story.

Here We Go Again

It's Sunday night and I haven't started packing yet.

Yes, starting tomorrow, I am back on the road. Phht.

This time I am only heading about 2-1/2 hours to the south of me. I even get to stay in the same state, same time zone. The bad news is I have to drive all by myself. If anyone is going to start a pool on how many time I will get lost, I want in on it. I know I'll be lost at least once this week.

From my last post, I caught a bug. I've been trying my best to get as well as I can so that I can make this trip tomorrow. Ron has truly done his best to help out.

Yesterday is a blur as I spent most of it in bed. Ron woke me for lunch and then again for dinner. Yeah, exciting Saturday. The best part was lunch. Ron made some home made chicken noodle soup! I'm telling you, nothing sits better in your tummy when you're not feeling well than chicken noodle soup, especially home made. I know that played a huge part in my making any progress on my road to recovery.

Today he was nice enough to catch up on the laundry while I stayed wrapped up in blankets on the couch all day.

Now it's time to pack some clean clothes, and a bunch of tissues. I have a feeling there may be a few posts in the near future about my exciting life back on the road. Yeah, it could happen.

Stay tuned for the next post from wild and crazy Columbus!

Ghosts That Go "Chirp" In The Night

I had a bad night last night. Some kind of bug decided to make its home with me for awhile and trust me, it took hold.

I woke just before 2:00 a.m. and was just miserable. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't swallow, my body hurt, I was tired and now I'm awake. Instead of laying there tossing and turning and waking Ron, I went down to the living room and planted myself on the recliner, wrapped up in my comforter. This wasn't too bad. I could make it through the night here.

Picture this. I have all of the lights off downstairs. It's very quiet. It's 2:00 in the morning for crying out loud. Then I hear it. "Chirp!" Naw, it was my imagination. A minute later, another "chirp". The first thing I did was grabbed my phone to see if it was chirping that I have a missed call. Nope. No one had wanted to talk to me. So, back to my chair. Sure enough, again, a chirp. Now it's coming to me, it sounds like a battery going on a smoke alarm. Ok, I can fix this. I just need to figure out which smoke alarm.

I have a thing about fire. I do the best I can with preventing it from happening. I have smoke alarms and fire extinguishers on every floor of my house. At least one of each. Overkill is better than not enough. I even enlisted the consulting services of Jeff in New York, a real live hero, a fireman, to decide where to put all of the smoke alarms and fire extinguishers.

I started with looking at the alarm at the top of the basement steps. I grabbed the alarm, and pulled out the battery. I no sooner did that when I heard the chirp again. Crap. It sounded like it came from downstairs in the basement. The only smoke alarm down there, from what I was told when we got the house, was that alarm was powered by electricity. I didn't think there was even a battery in it.

Well here I am, freezing in my jammies standing barefoot in the basement in the middle of the night trying to figure out where the chirping is coming from. Now that I'm typing this, I really AM brave (or maybe stupid!) as I don't usually go in the basement alone after dark! Anyway, as I'm standing there, I hear the chirp and decide it really is coming from the smoke alarm that's supposedly electrically powered. I was able to figure out how to take it from the ceiling, and then I noticed a door on the back for a battery. It had a battery back up! That's the good news. The bad news is that since I didn't know it had a battery back up, this battery was never changed with the other smoke alarms. That battery had been in there since at least November 2003 when we moved into the house.

I brought the smoke alarm upstairs into the kitchen to try to figure out how to open the battery door. Using a trusty butter knife, I pried the door open and removed the battery.

Then it happened.

It chirped.

In my hand.

I had the battery in one hand, and the smoke alarm in the other, not hooked to anything and with NO battery installed. And it's still chirping at me. Ok, I did freak out a little bit. I pushed the reset button a couple of times and all that did was make it chirp again. The little red light on the front would flash every minute, which according to the directions on the back, meant it was powered on and working. In my hand, no electricity and no battery. Yet it had . . . power.

Was this something I should wake Ron for? I decided maybe this wasn't life threatening even if it was a ghostly encounter. I put the battery on the counter, then wrapped the smoke alarm in a couple of kitchen towels and then in my coat just for good measure. I was hoping it would at least muffle the sound and let me try to sleep.

So I turned on a few lights in the living room, turned the TV on and crawled back under my comforter where the rest of my night was a little quieter.